Women’s History Month

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As the world recently celebrated International Women’s Day and as we continue to celebrate and honor Women’s History Month, a question that has often come up in my yoga sadhana, where are all the women in yoga history?

This question has come up before and continues to come up. Most of my mentors and teachers in my yoga studies have identified as women or non-binary. So when we look at the history of yoga, where are all the women?

It’s an interesting and important question. When I first started learning about yoga, I often read a version of yogic history where only men were allowed to practice for a long time and it wasn’t until white women became interested that women were then “allowed” to practice yoga. I find this really hard to believe, especially given the cultural importance of women in the history of India and other South Asian nations. If they were so important in the culture of a nation, why wouldn’t they be integral in the development of these practices which have been so intertwined with culture.

As I continue to study this topic, a part of me turns to the history of Tantric and Bhakti yoga which often call in the feminine divine as well as feminine devotion. I wonder if this erasure of women in mainstream yoga history is part of the impact of brahminism and colonialism in India and other South Asian countries.

Ultimately, at this point in my sadhana, I don’t have a clear understanding, sorry to disappoint you all. However, I have committed to learning more about the precense of women in the history of yoga and I will share my findings with you all.

Stay tuned!

My 2024 Resolution

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It’s been over a year since I posted on this blog. Last year I planned to dedicate more time and energy to writing, sharing my journey back to my yoga practice, and reconnect with my yoga community

Then I decided to plan a wedding. So that dedication fell through.

The good news is, it’s a new year. The wedding is done (it went really well, for anyone wondering) and I got an ew job. I have more time to dedicate to things I want to do, like writing about, learning, and practicing yoga. Here’s hoping I can really commit to continuing this blog. I’ll share my thoughts, perspectives, and journey back to my yoga practice.

What have I done in January?

Well – I traveled to Hawaii and reconnected with my love of nature, water, and all things Mother Earth gave us. I reconnected with myself in a way, realizing what I have been missing with the high stress pace of my previous job. I haven’t been able to take care of myself in the way I should, getting outside for hikes, spending time reading to nourish my mind and soul, and spending time near water. Going to the beach, even if the water is freezing here.

With my new job, I’m able to give myself that. I’m able to take care of myself. I’m able to commit to growth again.

So here’s to a new year!

New Year, Same me

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New year, new me…right?

Wrong!

Much like the beginning of 2022, this year is all about going back to the beginning. Returning to the start of my yoga practice has been tough. Unlearning a lot of asana focused aspects of western yoga while still trying to get some movement into my body has been a real struggle in 2022. The movement focused health mentality has really become deeply ingrained in my mind. Luckily, with so many programs focusing on rest, I’m reminded that rest is also a self-care, healthy habit.

So here I am, starting 2023 relearning ancient yogic practices not related exclusively to movement. I’m also trying to start each day by doing something for myself. Lately it’s been doing some mild stretches and making sure I make breakfast before starting work. During the days, I walk as much as I can, slowly building up to a daily mileage goal that is realistic and achievable.

Small steps…it’s all about small steps back to wellness.

National Yoga Month

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As National Yoga Month in the U.S. comes to an end, I can’t help but think of all the visual representations I see which are generally, stereotypically associated with yoga. Yes, I’m talking about yoga asana or postures.

Think about it. How often do you see someone living their yoga on Instagram or Facebook? How often do you see someone meditating or being mindful on Instagram or Facebook? Now, how often do you see someone in a headstand or handstand…or another “advanced” yoga posture?

As much work as we do to disassociate yoga solely with yoga asana, it seems the Western world is prevailing. I still more often than not see white bodies in what are considered “advanced” yoga postures all over social media, doing what they consider “advanced” yoga asana sequences on YouTube or other social media channels.

So what are some ways we can represent yoga without centering asana?

I’m glad you asked!

Here are some ways I have represented the yoga I practice and live without centering asana:

  1. Journaling
  2. Mantra Meditation
  3. Mindful Meals
  4. Drinking Water
  5. Reading Yoga Philosophy

Now clearly this isn’t an exhaustive list in the least. However, it might give you some ideas on how to practice and live yoga in the fullest expression of yoga…not just focus on asana! (And yes, I do like doing headstands and asana sometimes too! There is nothing wrong with asana.)

Mental Health Awareness Month

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Over the last few months, I’ve really gotten deeper into my own personal yoga practice. Perhaps this is why I’ve neglected my writing. I’ve become engrossed in my morning meditation, asana, and pranayama as well as the evening journaling and recapitulation. While my stress and anxiety has not gone away completely, I do feel much more capable of handling triggers as they arise.

Hence I want to talk about Mental Health Awareness Month. Throughout the month of May, social media, healthcare centers, and many other entities will be sharing information on how we can better improve our mental health. There are some really great resources out there.

What does yoga have to do with mental health? Yoga, in its full form, can be a great asset when managing mental health triggers. While yoga itself is not a complete solution, it can be an asset when finding oneself in situations where stress, anxiety, or other needs surface.

Yoga asana, pranayama, and especially meditation can be tools we use on a regular basis to help us make it through tough situations. This, paired with regular therapy or visits with medical professionals, can truly turn the tide and improve mental health.

Resources:

National Alliance on Mental Illness

Mental Health Resources for Children

Back to the Beginning…

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2021 was not my year for yoga. I thought it would be, I thought it would be the year I soared in the yoga world, maybe even made it better.

But I crashed. Hard. I flew too close to the sun and my wings melted and I felt back to Mother Earth.

Some would term this an existential crisis in yoga and they would be right. I gave in. I stopped teaching regularly and I stopped practicing regularly. I lost my practice. I tried to come back to it, time after time, yet something just wasn’t right. So I gave in to figure out what was going on with me and my yoga practice.

So I started doing other things. I grew a garden, I baked, I baked with ingredients from my garden. I traveled to see family and friends. I did a lot of things that nourished me and made me start to feel whole again. As I started to feel whole, I started to feel called to yoga once again. I started to miss the meditations and the asana practices. I started to miss the person I was when I practiced regularly.

So, here we are in 2022 and I’ve rededicated myself to my yoga practice. I have begun to wake up early and take classes. I’m back to being a student again, back to finding my love of yoga. I’m glad you’re still here for the ride!

Detachment

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Detachment is not that you own nothing, but that nothing should own you. {Alī}

Fear, anxiety, sadness…these are all emotions I’ve felt so deeply. It’s often felt as if they’ve owned me, they were how I defined myself.

Practicing detachment and grounding myself to the present has helped me release the hold these feelings have had on me. This doesn’t mean I don’t feel them. I do. Often. But they no longer own me. They no longer permeate my being. I am able to let these feelings go, using my yoga. And my Sangha.

How can we continue to practice detachment throughout our lives?

Here are some tips on how to embrace detachment:

  1. First and foremost, understand and accept that you can not control everything. This will take some time, but continue to remind yourself of this. Daily if necessary.
  2. Try to stop making your happiness or gratitude conditional on something outside of yourself. Don’t just say you’re happy because you’ve hit a goal, got a promotion, or got the thing you’ve been after. Express gratitude for the daily things in your life. Express happiness and joy for moments you’re experiencing daily.
  3. Recognize the difference between a need and a want. You need water. You want a fancy car.
  4. Try to reframe your experiences, your work responsibilities, everything you do as blessings.
  5. Try to practice compassion and empathy. Try to see the world from another’s point of view. Observe your surroundings rather than trying to constantly experience or control them.
  6. Don’t focus on the outcome or goal of a situation, focus on the experience of getting there. Whether it’s a trip or a project. Try to embrace the experience of it rather than just getting to the end of it.
  7. Before doing anything, pause. Take a deep breath. Proceed with clarity of mind and thought as much as possible.

New Year, New You? Maybe not…

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The new year is here. So many of us may feel such a sense of relief that 2020 is over. All the pain, all the frustration, all the wrong. It has to be over, right? A new year brings opportunity for growth, for change. As the old saying goes, new year, new me!

Maybe not…

2020 brought on a great deal of pain. COVID-19 came and spread with such voracity, no one saw it coming. So in this new year, do we think it will just go away? Does making our traditional resolutions make COVID gone? Does the existence of multiple vaccines make it possible to go back to the way things were?

I think not. Time, like many things, is a man-made construct. This idea that a new year will bring immense change is a large burden to place on ourselves. Yes, 2021 is going to provide changes and opportunities. We’ll have a new president. We will hopefully have greater access to the COVID vaccine making herd immunity a real possibility. We may have some realistic resolutions in place.

But let’s look back at 2020 and think of some of the good that may have come out of it. We saw social justice in action. Some of you may have joined your first protest. Some of you may have voted for the first time. We developed a vaccine in ground-breaking time. We used our voices to make changes that might ultimately improve our communities.

For me, here are a few intentions that I started in 2020 that I plan to carry into and throughout 2021:

1) continue taking care of myself through good foods, meditation, and yoga
2) spend more time with folks who empower, support, and unconditionally love me
3) take more screen breaks
4) spend more time outside
5) watch less tv

What are some intentions you want to carry through 2021?

Rest is Revolution

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It has been 280 days since my community has been under COVID related orders. The orders have shifted, the regulations have changed. Somehow, the entire time, it has felt like some form of quarantine. Whether I’m able to only see my partner, the one who lives with me. Or maybe I can grow my germ pod to up to ten people. Either way, I am restricted. My movements feel watched. And yet, I am okay. I am safe. I am healthy.

Through the last 280 days, I have learned one thing, above all else. Rest is Revolution. In 2020, rest has become my priority. Separating work and life. Focusing less on the mediocre idea of progress and productivity and actually putting my efforts and passions into what I do. It feels right. It feels real. My work is something for me to be proud of. It isn’t just for a paycheck. It isn’t to show that I’m using my paid hours productively. It’s to show that I am worthy of this title that I hold. It is to show that the work I say I do, I actually do. The changes I wish to make, I am making.

As 2020 comes to an end, my work has slowed. Sending in my last timesheets for the year, my last reports. I find myself looking forward to actual time off, time where I don’t have to hear my phone pinging me with emails unread, needing to be answered. I’m looking forward to time where I don’t have to log into zoom for hours at a time. I’m looking forward to the quiet, small holidays that I will be spending at home. No flights, no guest rooms, no living out of suitcases. As much as I miss travel, I am looking forward to this rest. This real, rooted, rest.

I hope you find rest this holiday season. See you in 2021!

Return of the Yogi

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Six months and two days ago my city went into quarantine.

Six month and five days ago, cops killed Breonna Taylor.

These two events have triggered a great deal of emotion in me. As we shut our doors and windows, turning inside rather than outside for entertainment and hobbies to pass the time, my thoughts continually turn to Breonna and what her last night was like. It probably felt normal, like most other nights in her life. Maybe it didn’t. I guess we’ll never know.

Every night over the last six months, I have gone to bed with a sense of heaviness. No matter how much joy I’ve found throughout the day, no matter how much I’ve been able to distract myself from the realities of what is happening, I’ve constantly felt that heaviness at the end of the day. I find myself not wanting to go to bed because that means drifting into an unknown, an unknown I’m not sure I’ll wake up from.

The reality, however, is that I will most likely wake up. The reality is that I probably won’t have my house by police using a no-knock warrant. The reality is, I am probably safe.

Over the last six months I’ve really come to understand my advantage in society. While I have and still find myself facing discrimination to some level, I can’t say I know the constant fear that the Black community faces. I am working to unlearn all the prejudices I have been taught and try to use my advantage to life up these suppressed voices. I am working to do what I can to make this world a better place.

This has been my yoga for the past six months and two days. What has your yoga looked like?